Wild Baby Rabbits

Being consumed with taking care of my little ones and working on my writing, this 

blog of mine has taken a bit of a back seat. Hurry up and Write is where I focus

on the writing side of my life, whereas Finding True Balance is a bit more personal

and introspective. I don't really care if anyone reads this one. It's more a way for 

me to stay accountable to myself in various areas of my life. First of which is my 

relationship with God. Am I keeping my focus on Him? That is a great question

to ask oneself each day. It's so easy to get caught up in the "cares of this world,"

and lose sight of what is most important - God, family, and those around me, 

next - working on my writing, keeping up with the housework and exercising.

Today, in an effort to live out the "balanced" idea, I decided to meet my little sister

for a serious stroller walk (it has been a while since I worked out). We had a great

walk and were able to catch up. Balancing between spending time with my 

kids, husband, extended family and friends can be a challenge. Of course, my kids

and husband get the majority of my attention, but it is harder to stay connected with

even my sisters, let alone friends. I was so thankful for the time to talk while the

kids were somewhat occupied, strapped in my double jogger, watching for 

wildlife. Afterwards, my sister being a Starbucks junkie, we stopped for an iced 

drink after our nearly 4 mile walk to rest. We loaded my kids up with Cheerios and 

juice and then parted ways. 

Upon arriving home, my husband pulled up into the driveway as well. I had forgotten

he had to split up his day at work so he could run an evening report. With the kids

needing to run the juice out of their systems, we let them loose in the backyard. The

chaos was complete once my 95 pound boxer mix was let out into the yard. My 

husband then informed me we have a mole problem. Showing me an area where

the ground was upheaved a bit with dead grass atop it, he stomped the area down

with his shoe.

To our surprise, 5 - 6 baby bunnies came racing out and scattered in various 

directions. Hobbes (our dog) tore after one in a flash. I heard something that sounded

like a squeaky toy and realized it was a baby rabbit in my dog's mouth. We screamed

for him to "Drop it," and "Leave it." Finally, he released the little lump of fur, and it fell to

the earth. I was horrified. The little animal was still breathing but appeared to have a 

broken leg. After Jason put the baby rabbit in a box, I found the number of a local 

wildlife clinic and left it there with a grim prognosis. The woman informed me the 

rabbit was severely injured and may not make it, but at least I had given it the 

best possible chance. I thought it had only suffered a broken leg. Saddened by the 

news of the little fur ball's condition, I returned home to my little crew. I know it's just 

a baby rabbit and that they die frequently in the wild, but I've always had empathy 

for cute furry things. 

How does this story relate to the idea of being balanced? It doesn't really, unless 

you take from it the lesson that crazy scenarios can happen in life, and one must 

be flexible. My day was turned upside down by the trauma of seeing my dog use 

a living animal as a chew toy and then having to deliver the animal to someone 

who can hopefully nurse it back to health. 

In the midst of our attempts to live the best, most balanced lives we can, life happens.

Crazy things can interfere with our day to day lives. We must take them all in stride 

and trust our Creator to take care of what we can't. Even more, we must trust Him

to help us with even the stuff we think we can handle on our own. Though we each 
may have a plan for our day, we may never know when wild baby rabbits may 
surface and race through it. 

"Trust in the LORD, and do good;

dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness.
Delight yourself in the LORD,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Commit your way to the LORD;
trust in him, and he will act.
He will bring forth your righteousness as the light,
and your justice as the noonday."

Psalm 37: 3-6, ESV

Being a Mom: Coming Full Circle

My daughter is always trying to figure out a way to stay up later than she should.

Tonight, she tried a new tactic, "Mom I want to stay up and learn how to be a 

Mommy!" There was a huge smile on her face. Anticipating my answer, she had

such hope in her eyes that this would work. Finally, she had figured out a way to

stay up past her bedtime. 

I answered, "Being a mommy is a lot of work, you don't get to play very much." 

She countered, "I like work," smiling as big as ever. 

Knowing I wouldn't win this debate, I gave her a kiss and a hug and changed 

the subject, but the conversation caused me to remember my childhood.

When I was a child, I used to wonder what I would be like when I was older, 

especially what it would be like to be a mother. For sure, I would be able to 

things my way, which at the time was always the best, most logical way. I 

wondered what my children would be like. I will be lucky if my kids are as 

good as me, I would think. There was never a question if I would meet and 

marry Prince Charming, but just what kind of Prince Charming would he be?

Now I look back over the last few years, and I am overwhelmed with how 

blessed I am. I met and married my Prince Charming, otherwise known 

as Jason, or occasionally as "Snack Attack," and I have two adorable and

intelligent children, who are a lot like me. Little did I know when I was younger

what kind of a kid I was. 

Although I was fairly well behaved, I had a will as strong as iron. If I decided 

something should be one way, well that's the way it was going to be. My poor 

mom. I now understand the effort that goes into guiding your child in the ways 

of the Lord, trusting the Him to help me temper the strong wills without breaking 

them. For that quality is a gift from God, that if used properly, can be a huge asset. 

I am thankful to my mom for directing and guiding my stubbornness, my impossible 

strong will. I hope and pray I can do as good of a job with my own children. 

As that small child so long ago, I could never have imagined my life would

be as good as it is now. No, my life isn't perfect. There are difficulties to overcome, 

and financial stresses to endure, and strong wills to direct, but God is good. 

My life is good, challenging at times, but so good. On this Mother's Day, I am 

reflecting on all God has given me, and it is all good! Happy Mother's Day!

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places" Ephesians 1:3, ESV

A Moment with Chocolate?

This week has definitely been a challenge so far. My daughter and I both
have the coxsackie virus, which sounds worse than it is. We both have blisters
in our throats, which are not comfortable, but feel pretty okay overall. The bummer
is that it is highly contagious, so we are stuck in the house for 7 - 10 days. No 
preschool for her, no work for me (work with babies), no playgrounds, no church
for Easter Sunday, no seeing our families this weekend. Not fair!! Today is day 
three of quarantine, and I'm feeling the effects.


Yesterday, I called my husband at work and jokingly, but really more seriously, 
told him I would need chocolate to survive this week. He was sure to pick up 
a bag of Dove dark chocolate bites for me. Yes! Thank you, wonderful man I 
married. It wouldn't be so difficult if both the kids were sick. Then they could
swap germs as much as they wanted, and it'd be okay. Keeping a three year
from touching her mouth every other moment is like keeping a curious child 
from pushing a mysterious button.


Do you find yourself relying on a little something when stressed? Mine is 
definitely chocolate, a moment of peace. I love it, but I wonder if instead of 
having a morsel of  bliss, I should be saying a quick prayer of, "Lord, help me de-stress." Okay, I don't wonder, I know. This morning, amidst a bit of chaos, my toddler walked
over to the radio and turned it on. It is set to our local Christian station, Joy FM.
Within minutes I felt the stress melting away. It was a great reminder, like
God was saying, "Remember I'm here to help you." Yes, even with the day to 
day stuff, He is here for us. 


Earlier in the week I was reading Psalm 23, which is many times read at 
funerals. I think it is intended much more for the living. He is there for us in the 
dark times, the happy times, the menial times, the stressful times, the 
peaceful times. He brings peace to our chaos, external and internal. 
Read Psalm 23 and think of difficulties you are going through. Give them 
to Him and find the peace you've been seeking, your moment with chocolate. 

The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures.

He leads me beside still waters.

He restores my soul.

     He leads me in paths of righteousness

 for his name’s sake.

 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil,

for you are with me;

your rod and your staff,

they comfort me.

 You prepare a table before me

in the presence of my enemies;

you anoint my head with oil;

my cup overflows.

 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me

all the days of my life,

and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever. 

Mamma on a Mission

This evening I was all ready to go to work, then I received a call I had been canceled. 
An occasional hazard of being a nurse, not enough patients on the floor, and you don't
get to work. I usually work weekends to avoid this and usually it works. Thursdays are 
also especially busy I have found. I work on a postpartum ward, and it seems the most deliveries tend to be on Thursdays, so naturally I was shocked. That's okay, I thought to myself, There is plenty around the house for me to do. I looked forward to accomplishing 
a couple of things that needed to be done. 


There was a pile of laundry on our bed that needed to be folded and put away, my 
dresser looked like a waterfall of clothing, an area in the basement needed to be 
cleared so my parents can store a few things (don't get me started on the condition of 
my basement), and the van needed to be tidied to help my mom move some things in 
the morning. On top of all these things that needed to be done, my left knee is in serious 
pain, and I have a certain monthly nuisance visiting me at the moment. Need I say more? Basically, "Watch out! Don't get in the way of the crazed, hormonal lady!" 


My husband seemed less than enthusiastic about it all (I was unaware of how truly
exhausted he was from the week). So, stuff needed to get done, and it had not been
possible to get it done during the day amidst meltdowns and toddler adventures. 
I was a bit frustrated with my second half and let him know it by being less than 
warm. I was torn with being frustrated with him and frustrated with myself. I definitely 
wasn't walking in love. I wasn't being patient or kind or slow to anger. I was thinking 
of myself and my goals, and although, yes it all needed to be done, I could have been 
more gracious. Oh, why can't I just be perfect?! Since we'll only be perfect once 
we're in Heaven with Jesus, I guess I'll have to deal with these imperfections in 
myself for a while longer. 


Kids laundry is folded and put away, waterfall has vanished from my dresser, 
basement section is cleared and swept for some guest crates, didn't get to the 
van, but that's okay, and I have some apologizing to do. I thought I prayed for 
some grace in the middle of it all, but since I don't really remember, It must not 
have been heartfelt. Note to self,next time I find myself in a frustrating situation, 
focus on the "plank" in my eye, not the speck in my neighbor's (in this case 
spouse's) eye. Ouch. Do I really want to post this? Lord, thank you for the lesson 
in humility. 


But He gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” James 4:6, ESV


“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye. Matthew 7:1 - 5, ESV

Endurance

The older I become, the more I realize that endurance is one of the most
important qualities we can possess. This is true in our walks with God and 
in our roles as parents and spouses and so on. Motherhood a beautiful and
wonderful thing, but there are times the monotony gets to me. Is there any
point to sweep and mop the kitchen floor, really, when it's a disaster literally
2 minutes later? Of course the answer is yes, but sometimes it feels like all 
the work I do is in vain. It's not, I know, but can't the house stay clean for one 
day!? 


Endurance. This journey in life is a marathon, not a sprint. Take it one step 
at a time. How do we do it and do it well, not just surviving every day? How
do we meet each day with a, "Yes! Thank you God for this day and let your
will be accomplished in me today?" How do we be the best mom and wife 
we can be each day, serving our families with love and kindness? 


In my opinion. It's the joy of the Lord. "... for the joy of the LORD is your strength."
Nehemiah 8:10. Endurance requires strength. I want to run this marathon of life
with joy and patience. How do we make sure we have the joy of the Lord every
day? By spending time with Him and being thankful. Try this, next time you are
not feeling like the best version of yourself, step away (if you can) and spend a 
few moments with God, thanking Him for all the things He's done for you and all
the blessings He's given you. A big one - eternal life. Just think about it. Jesus died
horrible and painful death on a cross so you and I can live an abundant life here
on earth and spend eternity with Him. Considering this, it makes whatever difficulty
you may be experiencing transient. God is awesome! He loves us! Thank you, God,
for your love that never changes or fails. Thank you that however inadequate I may 
feel You make me adequate, and even better, excellent. :) I feel better already. 


I hear the distant sobs of my boy who is letting me know his nap is over, and I just 
heard a disturbingly loud banging noise from my daughter's room. She never did 
go to sleep. Short nap time today, but thank you God for your love and joy! 


"Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it." 1 Corinthians 9:24, ESV

Are You Awake?

Yesterday I was reading Matthew chapter 24. It's all about the "end of the age," 

and teaches what will happen in the "end". Mostly though, it warns us to be ready 

for the return of Jesus Christ. After reading this, I thought about whether I am living

my life as though He may return tomorrow. I like to think I am, but apathy is an area

I struggle with. As I mentioned in my last post, there are days when I feel like I'm 

too busy to sit down and read the Bible or pray. It's not that I must do this every 

day to have God's acceptance or approval, it's that I should have an inner hunger

and desire to spend as much time in His word and with Him in prayer as possible.

God is concerned with the condition of our hearts, and not that we are checking off

a spiritual checklist every day. So, do we have that hunger to know God more and 

more every day, to follow Him wherever He leads us, to love Him more than our 

own lives? Would we be ready if He returned today?

Of course, no one knows when Jesus will return, but whether it is next month or in 

a hundred years, we need to be living every day as though Jesus may return at any 

time. This means not becoming lazy in our walk with God. I feel like this is a real 

problem for American Christians. As a culture, we are so comfortable in our lives. 

Maybe a little too comfortable? We need to be sure we are consistently walking 

out our faith. 

To me, walking out my faith means loving God with all my being and loving all

those around me by being gracious, patient, kind and so on. Practically speaking, 

praying a blessing over someone when they cut you off in traffic. Many times this prayer 

ends up being, "Lord, protect that person from themselves and protect everyone

who is driving around them!" 

"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."   1 Corinthians 13: 4-7 ESV

Back to the topic of our American culture, we have been so blessed with religious

freedom that I think we sometimes take it for granted. We tend to go through the 

motions while caught up in our day to day lives, not to mention all the mass 

information distractions. 

Would you be ready if Jesus returned today? Or would it catch you by surprise? 

Would you be overjoyed to see Him, or would you be nervous about whether

you had been living the way you should? Let's not be caught "sleeping" in our faith. 

Let's be wide awake in our faith every day, always living expectantly for His return.

"Therefore, stay awake, for you do not know on what day your Lord is coming. But know this, that if the master of the house had known in what part of the night the thief was coming, he would have stayed awake and would not have let his house be broken into. Therefore you also must be ready, for the Son of Man is coming at an hour you do not expect."  Matthew 24: 42-44, ESV

Low Blood Sugar

I am one of those people who have to have frequent meals/snacks with protein 
to maintain a normal blood sugar. If I go too long with out eating, my blood 
sugar plummets, and I become irritable, shaky, faint, and start to not make
much sense when talking. I find it more difficult to remember my snacks now
that I have two children. I get so busy taking care of them, I forget to eat or 
put eating lower on my prioritized list than I should. After a while, it catches 
up to me. Watch out! It's cranky mommy! My husband can testify to the horrible
metamorphosis that occurs when my blood sugar gets too low. Not a pretty sight.
Then, it hits me. Why did I let it happen again? I frantically devour a scoop of 
peanut butter (a nearly perfect food) to rectify the problem. I then return to 
the person my husband and children know, and I apologize. It is a reminder that
to take care of my family properly, I have to take care of myself. 


God has been showing me lately that this scenario is a good example of what
happens to us spiritually when we go too long with out prayer and reading 
the Bible. To keep one's blood sugar stable, one needs both protein and
carbohydrates in the appropriate proportions. The same applies to our spiritual
lives. I guess I could say the Bible is our protein source and prayer our carbs. 
I'm usually pretty good about praying every day (good carb intake), but there are 
times I can go a few days or more without getting into God's Word (protein). 
After a while, it'll catch up to me, and I wonder what is wrong with me. Then it
hits me, of course, I need to read my Bible. 


Too often we get caught up with our daily routine and chores. It's easy to be 
busy. But God has been reminding me not to leave protein out of my spiritual
diet. Yeah, life is super busy, but we do need to make sure we our taking care
of ourselves, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, so we can then take care
of our families and others around us. 


If you don't have time for a "big meal" of God's Word, then just read a few choice
verses or 1 chapter and at least get a "snack." You can read a few verses a few 
times a day instead of sitting down and reading for a half hour. We need to make
God our #1 priority. Read the Bible and be in prayer every day and watch how 
much God will be able to use you to minister to your children, spouse, friends, 
coworkers, and others. And that is why we want to walk this Christian life anyway,
to affect others for God. To show the love of Christ Jesus through us and point 
others towards Him. 


"Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you." James 4:8, ESV