I was watching a daytime talk show a couple weeks ago. The celebrity guest
was being interviewed about her life in general (working celebrity mom) and
how she felt about working and being a mom. The guest said her life was crazy
but good and spoke about when asked by someone in the past whether she felt
her life was "balanced." The guest said that no one can really ever be "balanced,"
that it simply wasn't possibly is this crazy world we live in (paraphrased). Although
I can see why she would say that, I disagree.
God Himself is One of order and balance. He created our universe and everything
in it. Just studying the human body, one realizes the importance of balance. If
something in the body out of balance, the body will have symptoms in response.
God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. So if God is balanced, in striving to
be more like Him, doesn't it make sense that our lives should be as well.
What is your definition of balance? The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines
balance (in this context) as, "To bring into harmony or proportion (verb); mental
and emotional steadiness (noun)." Can our lives be brought into harmony? I'm
not trying to go all Zen on you now, but is it possible to live a balance life,
harmonious with God and the Bible? How can we do this? Loving God with
all our hearts and minds and loving others as we love ourselves is the most
important commandment God gave us (Mark 28:31). If we love God with every
part of our being and share His love to all those around us, we will live life as
we should.
Balance doesn't mean being perfect, having a perfectly clean home, perfect
children and a perfect husband. I believe it means having your priorities straight.
Our number one priority is to love God, number 2 is to love people (not always
easy). That's it! When we walk in love, we are more patient and kind, the
person we really would like to be all the time. Again, having balance in your
life is not having perfection. It's knowing what is important and prioritizing
accordingly. Is it more important that my house is always clean or that my
children feel loved because I spent quality time with them? Not saying you
can't let your kids ever play by themselves while you clean, but don't let that
always be the case. Balance is definitely possible.
"And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect
harmony." Colossians 3:14 ESV (English Standard Version)
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Monday, February 14, 2011
Being Still
Being a mother, I find myself constantly busy. There is always something that needs to
be cleaned, someone who needs help going to the bathroom or a diaper change, and
always the long to do list (when all the everyday chores are done). It never ends... ever.
Such is the life of the greatest occupation of all time - motherhood. I am slowly starting
to accept the never-endingness (yes, I just made up that word) of it all. But something
can easily get lost in the mix. Can you guess?
Time with the Lord. God has been reminding me lately not to be so busy, but who
can help it? I have been feeling the need to definitely spend much more time
in prayer, mostly, to be still and wait on God. However, I am finding it extremely
difficult and find myself thinking about all the laundry waiting on me instead.
One of my favorite quotes by Mother (now Saint) Teresa, was during an interview.
She was asked what she said to God during prayer. "Not much." She replied.
When asked what God said to her, again she answered, "Not much." What was the
point then? "We are together." She answered. How powerful. Being with God, sitting
in His presence is life changing to say the least. God wants to spend more time with
When asked what God said to her, again she answered, "Not much." What was the
point then? "We are together." She answered. How powerful. Being with God, sitting
in His presence is life changing to say the least. God wants to spend more time with
us. He loves us more than we can imagine.
But Mother Teresa didn't have children you may say. Well, not biologically, but
she kept busy serving the needs of others. Throughout it all, though, she didn't
lose sight of what was truly important, her personal relationship with God. In Luke
10:38 - 42, there is the story of two sisters, Mary and Martha. Jesus came to their
house and was teaching. Mary sat at his feet, soaking up all she could. Martha
busily rushed around, making sure everyone had all they needed. Even though
she was been an excellent hostess, she was totally missing the point. Martha
complained to Jesus about Mary, but He said, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious
and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the
good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”
As you enjoy this day that celebrates love, remember Who loves you more
than any earthbound person could and Who is longing to spend time with you
whenever you'll stop long enough to sit still. I am writing to myself more than
anyone. :) Have a Happy Valentine's Day.
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
I Corinthians 13:4-6
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Let Go and Breathe: Part 2
Last Monday afternoon I was quite relieved when my husband arrived home from work. Freezing rain had been falling the majority of the day and road conditions were not the
best. It was forecasted that it would start icing/sleeting about 4 - 6 am the following
morning."Of course," I said to him, "you won't actually go to work tomorrow." My husband replied, "We will see what it looks like in the morning." What?! I thought to myself. Can
he be serious? The freezing precipitation was to last about 20 to 24 hours. Starting with
ice then changing over to snow at some point. The lesser amount of ice, the greater
amount of snow. A range of .5" to 1" of ice and anywhere from 6" to 18" of snow. I wasn't
so much worried about him getting to work safely. I was worried about him being about to
get home safely.
As the evening wore on, more and more anxiety was building within me. Everyone was
going to be staying home from work (excepting emergency response and hospital staff).
Why would my husband risk his life for an office job? It didn't make sense. Even when
I was active duty in the Air Force, on days like that there was delayed reporting and
essential personnel only days. Safety first. This has been ingrained in me from a child
(being the daughter of a firefighter) through my training as a nurse and to my days in
the Air Force. Didn't everyone prioritize that way?
In the late evening, not be able to secure a definite, "Not going to work" from my
husband, I became physically sick. Was this one of the situations where one gets
a bad feeling that should be recognized as warning or was it just a overwhelming
response to fear? I struggled with this. Laying in bed, I couldn't go to sleep. I felt sick
to my stomach and had a lump in my throat. Not wanting to keep my husband awake,
I went to the family room to look at some emails. Jason came out to see if I was okay.
I told him I wasn't angry with him, I just was too upset to sleep and needed some
distraction and told him to go to sleep.
My imagination was running wild. I was imagining my life as a widow, raising two small children by myself, crying myself to sleep each night. I started crying. What was I doing?
I then picked up my Bible and read from John 15, my favorite chapter. I prayed for God's peace and then went to bed.
Why so much anxiety? Isn't God in total control? Aren't our lives in His hands? Are
not our footsteps guided by Him? Will He not provide for us in every way? Where
was my faith and trust in our wonderful God? This situation was totally out of my
control and there was nothing I could do about it. I had to trust God that He would
protect Jason, no matter what the next day brought.
The next morning, Jason woke me at 5:50 a.m. to let me know the roads were not in good condition and that he would work from home. I was so relieved. Content, I fell back to
sleep. A short hour later, he woke me again stating that people were in fact making it
into his workplace safely and he had to get going. What?! Okay, I told myself, this is
no time to argue. Just help him and trust God. Thinking ahead of the possibility that he
could get stuck at work (if we did get the foot and a half of snow), I suggested that he
take a change of clothes. He pulled out a bag, and I packed it with the change of
clothes, a pillow and toiletries. I also packed him a couple days work of food. My
man was going to be prepared. I kissed him good-bye, wondering in the back of
my mind if it would be the last time. Dramatic, I know, just being honest. He called
me when he arrived at work and I breathed a sigh of relief. Thank you, God.
I had an average morning with the kids, breakfast, playtime, lunchtime, and nap time. A
few minutes after I put the kids down from their naps, Jason called me (about 12:30) and
said that he was being sent home. My response was both relief and concern. It had been sleeting all day and had not changed over to snow yet. Road conditions were bad, but
on the upside, hardly anyone was out on the road. Jason called me (hands free, of
course) periodically, reassuring me he was safe and taking it slow. Although it took him
twice as long as usual, and he almost got stuck a couple times, he made it home without incident. To say that I was ecstatic to see him would be an understatement.
This experience revealed a weakness in me that was much bigger than I had admitted
to myself. There are areas that I trust God so completely and so fully. Why do I give in
to worry? God loves us so much and desires to give us a hope and a future. Jeremiah
29:11, "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and
not for evil, to give you a future and a hope."
I am sure there will plenty of opportunities for me to exercise my growth in this area. I
can't say that I look forward to it, but I take comfort in Philippians 4:4-9:
best. It was forecasted that it would start icing/sleeting about 4 - 6 am the following
morning."Of course," I said to him, "you won't actually go to work tomorrow." My husband replied, "We will see what it looks like in the morning." What?! I thought to myself. Can
he be serious? The freezing precipitation was to last about 20 to 24 hours. Starting with
ice then changing over to snow at some point. The lesser amount of ice, the greater
amount of snow. A range of .5" to 1" of ice and anywhere from 6" to 18" of snow. I wasn't
so much worried about him getting to work safely. I was worried about him being about to
get home safely.
As the evening wore on, more and more anxiety was building within me. Everyone was
going to be staying home from work (excepting emergency response and hospital staff).
Why would my husband risk his life for an office job? It didn't make sense. Even when
I was active duty in the Air Force, on days like that there was delayed reporting and
essential personnel only days. Safety first. This has been ingrained in me from a child
(being the daughter of a firefighter) through my training as a nurse and to my days in
the Air Force. Didn't everyone prioritize that way?
In the late evening, not be able to secure a definite, "Not going to work" from my
husband, I became physically sick. Was this one of the situations where one gets
a bad feeling that should be recognized as warning or was it just a overwhelming
response to fear? I struggled with this. Laying in bed, I couldn't go to sleep. I felt sick
to my stomach and had a lump in my throat. Not wanting to keep my husband awake,
I went to the family room to look at some emails. Jason came out to see if I was okay.
I told him I wasn't angry with him, I just was too upset to sleep and needed some
distraction and told him to go to sleep.
My imagination was running wild. I was imagining my life as a widow, raising two small children by myself, crying myself to sleep each night. I started crying. What was I doing?
I then picked up my Bible and read from John 15, my favorite chapter. I prayed for God's peace and then went to bed.
Why so much anxiety? Isn't God in total control? Aren't our lives in His hands? Are
not our footsteps guided by Him? Will He not provide for us in every way? Where
was my faith and trust in our wonderful God? This situation was totally out of my
control and there was nothing I could do about it. I had to trust God that He would
protect Jason, no matter what the next day brought.
The next morning, Jason woke me at 5:50 a.m. to let me know the roads were not in good condition and that he would work from home. I was so relieved. Content, I fell back to
sleep. A short hour later, he woke me again stating that people were in fact making it
into his workplace safely and he had to get going. What?! Okay, I told myself, this is
no time to argue. Just help him and trust God. Thinking ahead of the possibility that he
could get stuck at work (if we did get the foot and a half of snow), I suggested that he
take a change of clothes. He pulled out a bag, and I packed it with the change of
clothes, a pillow and toiletries. I also packed him a couple days work of food. My
man was going to be prepared. I kissed him good-bye, wondering in the back of
my mind if it would be the last time. Dramatic, I know, just being honest. He called
me when he arrived at work and I breathed a sigh of relief. Thank you, God.
I had an average morning with the kids, breakfast, playtime, lunchtime, and nap time. A
few minutes after I put the kids down from their naps, Jason called me (about 12:30) and
said that he was being sent home. My response was both relief and concern. It had been sleeting all day and had not changed over to snow yet. Road conditions were bad, but
on the upside, hardly anyone was out on the road. Jason called me (hands free, of
course) periodically, reassuring me he was safe and taking it slow. Although it took him
twice as long as usual, and he almost got stuck a couple times, he made it home without incident. To say that I was ecstatic to see him would be an understatement.
This experience revealed a weakness in me that was much bigger than I had admitted
to myself. There are areas that I trust God so completely and so fully. Why do I give in
to worry? God loves us so much and desires to give us a hope and a future. Jeremiah
29:11, "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and
not for evil, to give you a future and a hope."
I am sure there will plenty of opportunities for me to exercise my growth in this area. I
can't say that I look forward to it, but I take comfort in Philippians 4:4-9:
"4Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. 5Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand;6do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
8Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. 9What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you."
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Let Go and Breathe: Part 1
It is Tuesday evening and we are in the middle of an ice/snow storm that is affecting much of the midwest. I have learned a lot of myself the last 36 hours in preparing for and dealing with the effects of this storm. Mainly, that I have control issues. I think the majority of mothers would agree that in one aspect of their lives, or more, they are control freaks. I maybe one in more areas than a few. My dear husband can testify to that. I was aware it was something I needed to work on, but had no idea how much it gripped me.
Yesterday morning, I braved the freezing rain and grocery store crowds to secure items necessary for a snowed in (or iced in) week. Things such as milk, bread, drinking water, dinner fixin's. I headed straight for the milk. There were dozens of moms with small kids in the store starting with the normal produce section, so I had act quickly. I got there just in time... no gallons of my Full Circle whole milk left, but there were 3 half gallons. I snatched all three of them, and then proceeded to the bread aisle. I picked up one of the last three loaves of bread (in my favorite brand). I was on a role. After zig-zagging through the store, I was able to secure all the items I would need for the week.
Unable to find a dry cart that would hold both my children (they do have double seater carts), my oldest, who is almost 3 and a half, had to follow along, trying not to be distracted along the way. And of course, we did have to stop by the lobster tank. Anyone who knows my 3 year old knows that she doesn't walk, she bounces, like a little tigger, wherever she goes. Normally, I would have been frustrated with the constant bouncing, the hanging off my pant pockets, the purposeful stepping on the back of my heels, the repeated misdirection, but instead, I just took a deep breath and let it go. She's three and she is full of energy, so she bounces. Deal with it, I said to myself. Instead of sighing out of frustration, I giggled at how joyful she is. God was telling my to chill out. Okay, I can do that. I let her help me put the groceries onto the conveyer belt at the checkout and let her help me put the groceries away at home. She had a great time because loves to help me.
What do I take away from this? I do need to relax more and let go. Let go and let God seems so cliche, but it is necessary in our walk with God. We need to trust Him completely, from the smallest frustrations, to the much bigger problems that arise. I was proud of myself for growing in this little way yesterday. Taking a deep breath and letting my little one be herself felt so good. Little did I know how much more I would be tested in my trust in God that very evening and into the next day (today). This bigger test would prove to be extremely difficult and will be in Part 2, next post.
Fun mom tip: how to entertain a hungry toddler in the last 5 minutes dinner is in the oven. Perform head, shoulder, knees and toes, pointing to body parts as you go. Your toddler will love it and learn body parts in the process. Big plus - mini workout for you (reaching down to toes). :)
Yesterday morning, I braved the freezing rain and grocery store crowds to secure items necessary for a snowed in (or iced in) week. Things such as milk, bread, drinking water, dinner fixin's. I headed straight for the milk. There were dozens of moms with small kids in the store starting with the normal produce section, so I had act quickly. I got there just in time... no gallons of my Full Circle whole milk left, but there were 3 half gallons. I snatched all three of them, and then proceeded to the bread aisle. I picked up one of the last three loaves of bread (in my favorite brand). I was on a role. After zig-zagging through the store, I was able to secure all the items I would need for the week.
Unable to find a dry cart that would hold both my children (they do have double seater carts), my oldest, who is almost 3 and a half, had to follow along, trying not to be distracted along the way. And of course, we did have to stop by the lobster tank. Anyone who knows my 3 year old knows that she doesn't walk, she bounces, like a little tigger, wherever she goes. Normally, I would have been frustrated with the constant bouncing, the hanging off my pant pockets, the purposeful stepping on the back of my heels, the repeated misdirection, but instead, I just took a deep breath and let it go. She's three and she is full of energy, so she bounces. Deal with it, I said to myself. Instead of sighing out of frustration, I giggled at how joyful she is. God was telling my to chill out. Okay, I can do that. I let her help me put the groceries onto the conveyer belt at the checkout and let her help me put the groceries away at home. She had a great time because loves to help me.
What do I take away from this? I do need to relax more and let go. Let go and let God seems so cliche, but it is necessary in our walk with God. We need to trust Him completely, from the smallest frustrations, to the much bigger problems that arise. I was proud of myself for growing in this little way yesterday. Taking a deep breath and letting my little one be herself felt so good. Little did I know how much more I would be tested in my trust in God that very evening and into the next day (today). This bigger test would prove to be extremely difficult and will be in Part 2, next post.
Fun mom tip: how to entertain a hungry toddler in the last 5 minutes dinner is in the oven. Perform head, shoulder, knees and toes, pointing to body parts as you go. Your toddler will love it and learn body parts in the process. Big plus - mini workout for you (reaching down to toes). :)
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