It is Tuesday evening and we are in the middle of an ice/snow storm that is affecting much of the midwest. I have learned a lot of myself the last 36 hours in preparing for and dealing with the effects of this storm. Mainly, that I have control issues. I think the majority of mothers would agree that in one aspect of their lives, or more, they are control freaks. I maybe one in more areas than a few. My dear husband can testify to that. I was aware it was something I needed to work on, but had no idea how much it gripped me.
Yesterday morning, I braved the freezing rain and grocery store crowds to secure items necessary for a snowed in (or iced in) week. Things such as milk, bread, drinking water, dinner fixin's. I headed straight for the milk. There were dozens of moms with small kids in the store starting with the normal produce section, so I had act quickly. I got there just in time... no gallons of my Full Circle whole milk left, but there were 3 half gallons. I snatched all three of them, and then proceeded to the bread aisle. I picked up one of the last three loaves of bread (in my favorite brand). I was on a role. After zig-zagging through the store, I was able to secure all the items I would need for the week.
Unable to find a dry cart that would hold both my children (they do have double seater carts), my oldest, who is almost 3 and a half, had to follow along, trying not to be distracted along the way. And of course, we did have to stop by the lobster tank. Anyone who knows my 3 year old knows that she doesn't walk, she bounces, like a little tigger, wherever she goes. Normally, I would have been frustrated with the constant bouncing, the hanging off my pant pockets, the purposeful stepping on the back of my heels, the repeated misdirection, but instead, I just took a deep breath and let it go. She's three and she is full of energy, so she bounces. Deal with it, I said to myself. Instead of sighing out of frustration, I giggled at how joyful she is. God was telling my to chill out. Okay, I can do that. I let her help me put the groceries onto the conveyer belt at the checkout and let her help me put the groceries away at home. She had a great time because loves to help me.
What do I take away from this? I do need to relax more and let go. Let go and let God seems so cliche, but it is necessary in our walk with God. We need to trust Him completely, from the smallest frustrations, to the much bigger problems that arise. I was proud of myself for growing in this little way yesterday. Taking a deep breath and letting my little one be herself felt so good. Little did I know how much more I would be tested in my trust in God that very evening and into the next day (today). This bigger test would prove to be extremely difficult and will be in Part 2, next post.
Fun mom tip: how to entertain a hungry toddler in the last 5 minutes dinner is in the oven. Perform head, shoulder, knees and toes, pointing to body parts as you go. Your toddler will love it and learn body parts in the process. Big plus - mini workout for you (reaching down to toes). :)
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